yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
no you cant smoke seaweed
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
