hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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