Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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