David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
