therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
