I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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