Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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