Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I smell like Dick and happiness
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
