seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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