Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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