i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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