She announced her abortion via fbk
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
