Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
