he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
