If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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