the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
