I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
