she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
