What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
