If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
