i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
