that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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