if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
