i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
