I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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