shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
