did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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