last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Randomize
