Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
