If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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