Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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