Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
She needs sedatives and a leash
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
