Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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