glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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