he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
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