I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
porn star boner night. come get it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
