It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize