I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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