so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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