im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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