I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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