WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
