I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
