and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
