Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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