Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
