i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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