I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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