just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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