You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
